Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Religious Intolerance... and the journey of frank

So... I'm pretty pissed off...

While at work today, I was tipped off by a few my management that my Buddha statue, which sits on my desk, was creating QUITE the controversy. Buddha I thought? Controversy? JeeeWizz, that just doesn't sound like the Buddha I know! Usually you find Buddha under his tree meditating, searching for enlightenment. He can also be found teaching peace, love, kindness and tolerance, so when I heard the office gossip I was shocked!

I work in a Support Center, for a very popular computer manufacturer. The floor plan is extremely open concept, and there are about 80 people, neatly tucked into rows that surround my desk, next to a popular coaching/meeting room. Apparently "someone", not from my team, but from another managers team has been making complaints that my Buddha statue is inappropriate, and upsets them as a Christian person. Apparently their faith is so strong, and they have so much trust in their God that no one else should be allowed to think differently, that there is no room for other teachers in the realm of "religion" other than their messiah Jesus Christ.

Thats when I took a big shit in my pants... Leave it to a Christian to shout religious intolerance, I am just upset I didn't have anything pagan at my desk today, I would have been a rather lovely day for a witch burning.

So, Buddha and I have decided that its 2009, not 563BC and he needs to acclimate to today's society.

Everyone, please say a warm hello to Frank:

Frank is an e-mail support agent, he likes long walks on the beach, enjoys some yoga here and there, and drives a VW Bug. He's funny, smart and most certainly NOT controversial. With his mouse in hand he can process 15 customers e-mails an hour, while rocking out to his favorite Taylor Smith album. The note on his chest says "Hi, My Name Is: Frank". No controversial here people, keep the line moving. Ohhhh, no no, that's not Buddha, that's Frank, he moved over from the Dispatch Department last week.

So far, so good. No one has blew his cover yet. Keep your fingers crossed for us please.
If only closed minds came with closed mouths.
Embrace the Journey,
Bret and Frank


Jopan said...

biguts. sometimes i think religion was created as an excuse to wage war. I've never known such pointless, thoughtless and down right dumb, sheep, as some religius people. You know, the ones that seem to be repeating all their 'religius knowlegde' at you as though they've memerised it all from a book (which they have). they've not come out with a single personal opinion since they where eight years old. They're brainwashed you see. But don't worry soon they'll have you 'all fixed up and on the right track with the one true god'. If they try i think you should make a run for it.

Ayre said...

Holy fuck that's mind-blowing and of course SO expected from ignorant, intolerant Christians.

mrsb said...

I will never understand the fundies. I know plenty of open minded Christians. The fundies (of any religion) give everyone else a bad name.

I hope your management gave you the tip off in support, not as a way to try to get you to make Frank disappear quietly. I'd be taking a big, huge shit in my pants if they tried to make you get rid of him!

I hope Frank starts sporting a large pentagram necklace soon, lol!

Jane said...

I'm laughing my ass off over here. There is a store near my brother's house that sells outrageously funny (pee in your pants) gag gifts like "boxing nuns" and wind-up Jesus that "poops" raisonettes out of his um, er...robe. That would be hilareous to bring those to the office. I am a Christian of sorts and I assure you that I am not one of those easily offended bible toting proverb speaking nuts. I also believe in the beauty of other religions. I've got several Buddha statues around my house. My favorite is one that I inherited from a man who was very ill and moved back to Canada. He was a devout Buddhist and it means so much to me. I've got a monkey butler that holds a rosary, mardi gras beads and tibetan prayer beads in his hand. Screw those hoity toity people! I love the photo of Frank and personally, I bet he gets more work done than half the people in that office :))

Smooches :))))))))))))

Jen said...

Great approach Bret. It is so sad that this coworker is so insecure about his beliefs that he/she can't even see evidence of another perspective.

marjean said...

Great one, Bret...I haven't stopped laughing yet!

Anonymous said...

...still laughing!
What is it with these so-called christians? Cripes, Buddha predates Christ AND taught & believed in all the same things that Jesus did years later.

It obviously falls under the idolotry rule in the bible.
But you're not worshipping Buddha, you've put him to work!
These people need to get a life, do some community service, watch an episode of South Park!
...I'm getting so tired of all the things that are "upsetting" to them!

Sue said...

Just found your blog. Great! Yes Christians are the biggest fucking hippocrites (sp?) in the world. I like to think of them as walking around with blinders on and covering their ears saying over and over "La la la I can't hear you". The minute you challenge them on their thoughts/religion, they start to "pray" for you, in that you'll see the truth. Leave it to a Christian to be offended by a Buddha statue. Christ. What next???? Unfortunately (or fortunately, not sure which today) my daughter was accepted into a Christian school (as the other ones around here suck rocks). Awesome awesome school. Not a whole lot of crammed down your throat religion. If so we'll pull her out. I guess as long as they don't see my buddha on my minivan dashboard I'll be OK :)

SacredAngel said...


Nydia said...

*sigh*... That's what I always say... Some people have nothing to do in their lives, so they have to upset others!!! It's soooo boring! Why doesn't he go and place a Christ statue on his own desk instead of complaining about other people's faith?! It gives me the creeps.
Say a warm hi to Frank for me, Brett, keep him well and tuned!

Kisses and support from us.

Wild Roaming One (WRO) said...

LOL ~ that is freaking funny! Frank is clearly cool with being one of the crowd now and better able to accept himself now that he's all that!

Found your through Bohomom...


solsticedreamer~laoi gaul~williams said...

blimey! actually i am speechless in an effort not to have a good old offensive rant!

Mel said...

I think Frank answered an email from me a week or so ago....he was extremely helpful and responded in a timely fashion. I would like to put forward my vote for Employee of the Month....

What can be said, really? Holiday tree, anyone?

My brother - a wonderfully irreverent soul -- made this t-shirt with a piccy of Jesus on it -- the caption reads above the pic - "What would Jesus Do..." and below...."for a Klondike bar"

I almost died laughing -- everyone else was scandalized but I thought it was freakin' brilliant..

Dia said...

The photo of 'Frank' is great!! Is he available for consulting??
Last week I heard Wm. Paul Young talk (to a PACKED house at my very liberal Ch) about his book 'The Shack' & what an impact it's making round the world.
He was raised by missionary parents, & this book - written for his kids - tries to portray God 'outside the box' & not enamored of 'religions' - intriguing take on things!

Keep on keepin' on -

Eco Yogini said...

lol- I LOVE FRANK. How is he doing today??

on a more serious note... I wear my Goddess pendant to work- I have several actually, but one in particular actually is shaped more like a woman. I keep waiting for someone to comment... but no one has. I have had some clients' parents (I'm a speech therapist for preschoolers) tell me they pray for me to Jesus at night... but that really was just a kind gesture, I didn't get any malicious or judgemental intent from that at all.
It is tricky though... I think if a coworker had a crucifix on their cubicle wall (at a time where I worked in joint desks) I may have said something...

however- I LOVE your Buddha, AHEM I mean FRANK :)

Spidermonkey said...

This doesn't surprise me at all. Years ago, I would have been one of those offended "Christians", but my faith/beliefs have taken a huge turn over the years and now I'm very much interested in learning and exploring other beliefs. That, ironically, is one of the major things that eventually turned me off of christianity- religious intolerance- and it sent me running in other directions. And now I find it very hard to tolerate intolerance! Vicki

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